Imagine if you were blown to dust within a second, with only a shadow left behind. On
August 6, 1945, Hiroshima and Nagasaki were painted with shadows as U.S bombs were
dropped onto them. After Pearl Harbor, the U.S needed a way to end the war, so they decided
to use atomic bombs on Japan. Consequently, millions of innocent Japanese civilians passed
away, or experienced health problems and trauma. As you can see, the U.S did not make the
right decision to use atomic bombs against Japan in order to end the war.


how can I improve this paragraph?

Respuesta :

To improve your paragraph, consider adding more structure and balance to your argument. You could acknowledge the complexity of the historical context, the decision-making process of the U.S. at the time, and the long-term consequences for both nations. Also, ensure you back up your viewpoint with evidence or historical analysis to strengthen your argument. Here's a revised version:

"On August 6, 1945, the cities of Hiroshima and Nagasaki were marked by the haunting silhouettes of those who vanished in an instant, victims of the atomic bombs dropped by the U.S. This decision, following the attack on Pearl Harbor, was seen by the U.S. as a means to swiftly conclude World War II. However, the catastrophic loss of life, lasting health issues, and psychological trauma inflicted upon countless Japanese civilians raise profound ethical questions. It's crucial to consider whether the use of such devastating force was justified, even in the context of war, and to reflect on the grave implications it had on humanity and international warfare."

This approach provides a more nuanced perspective while still conveying the gravity of the historical event.
Q&A Education